Week 15 - Texans Dominate Titans

Titans: 16
Texans: 37
Setting: Friday night in the small segment of Milwaukee populated by the stadium formerly in Houston, Texas.

Even when considering the amount of injuries the Titans have gone through, Titans owner still felt confident this would be an easy win for his team against a feeble 4-9 Texans. In the league forums, he said things like "I can't believe that you think you are going to win. I know you suck. You know you suck. The proof will come on Friday/Saturday."

The proof certainly came. Beating the idiotic Vegas spread, the Texans CRUSHED the Titans 37-16. Certainly, Titans owner Chris Schofield will defend his squad, placing the blame on the shoulders of his replacements. After all, Vince Young and Jared Allen could easily have turned the tide for this game.

Not.

After all, the Titans true superstar, the one Schofield prides himself on so dearly, Chris Johnson was held to 47 yards on 15 attempts, with a goal-line TD. He averaged 3.1 yards per carry. On the other team, Shonn "First Round Draft Pick" Greene ran 20 times for 82 yards, with an average of 4.1 yards per carry.

Matt "Damon" Schaub kept the Texans moving forward, throwing 15/21 for 229 yards and 4 TDs. For the Titans Brian "Grocery Stocker" Hoyer went 10/26 for 135 yards and one touchdown, simply doing the best he could.

The Texans played with rage in their hearts after seeing their defense's leader and strong safety Aspha "ARRGGHH" Savage being carted off the field after breaking his collarbone. He was later seen on the sidelines holding his severed collarbone, and was beating it violently against his helmet to rile up the crowd. In his place came Rico "Holy" Ash, who held the defense together enough to win.

Defense for the Texans was spotty. While they did a wonderful job stopping the dangerous toss plays to Chris Johnson, tight end and former Texan Owen Daniels managed 67 yards on four receptions and a touchdown. Frustration in Australia could be felt all the way across the globe (but it was really laggy frustration), when an outside run by Chris Johnson on 4th & 3 resulted in a fumble (it looked like Johnson tried pitching the ball, in fact), which was recovered by Texans DE Antonio Smith. This was the lone turnover of the game, though the Texans did stop the Titans one other time on 4th down.

All in all, the Texans dominated an excuse-riddled Titans team, going up from 21-10 at the half to 31-10 in the third quarter.

"Am I happy," Texans owner Mike Suszek pondered. "Fuck no, I'm not happy. We lost the heart and soul of our team, Aspha. I had to be talked into playing classy at the end there."

"But really," he added. "We love AC, it's always great playing him, and we respect him. And," as he smirked one last time, "we own him."

With this win, Shonn Greene reached 1,008 yards rushing for the season, and Andre Johnson reached 1,036 yards receiving for the season, two milestones that Suszek was hoping to reach by season's end, and is thrilled it happened against the Titans.

STATS:
Titans/Texans
1st Downs 8 / 12
3rd Downs Att. 10 / 10
3rd Downs Eff. 3 / 7
4rd Downs Att. 3 / 0
4rd Downs Eff. 1 / 0
Pass Yards 123 / 222
Total Offense 177 / 302
Rush Yards 54 / 80
Time of Poss. 8:57 / 23:03
Penalty Count 1 / 3
Penalty Yards 12 / 49


Passing:
[TEN] Brian Hoyer - 10/26, 135 yds, 1 TD, 68.6 rating
[HOU] Matt Schaub - 15/21, 229 yds, 4 TDs, 146.6 rating

Rushing:
[TEN] Chris Johnson - 15 for 47 yds, 1 TD
[HOU] Shonn Greene - 20 for 82 yds

Receiving:
[TEN] Owen Daniels - 4 for 67, 1 TD
[TEN] Chris Johnson - 3 for 21
[TEN] Bensly Blake - 2 for 38
[HOU] Bo Scaife - 4 for 44 yds, 2 TDs
[HOU] Andre Johnson - 4 for 87 yds
[HOU] Jacoby Jones - 3 for 40, 1 TD
[HOU] Shonn Greene - 3 for 48, 1 TD

Defense:
[TEN] Brandon Flowers - 4 solo tackles, 2 tackle assists
[TEN] Kendall Weatherspoon - 4 solo tackles, 1 tackle assist, 3 tackles for loss
[HOU] Brian Cushing - 6 solo tackles, 1 tackle assist, 2 tackles for loss
[HOU] DeMarcus Ware - 1 sack, 5 solo tackles, 2 tackle assists, 2 tackles for loss