Eminem interested in buying the Detroit Lions -Associated Press

A Wall Street Journal report indicates that rapper Eminem is in preliminary talks to buy a controlling interest in the Detroit Lions. The rap artist, fresh off of successful comeback album "Recovery" in 2010, has mentioned in comments that the purchase is based around getting the remaining members of his 1996 group "D12" to quote, "leave me the hell alone". When reached for comment, Eminem had this to say, "I can't get away from them, especially Bizarre! I feel like I am going to get stuck being his nurse and paying his health care bills!" Many readers may recognize Bizarre as the overweight rapper from "D12". Recent reports have him living at Eminem's house and eating a lot of the rap artist's food. There have also been rumors that Bizarre also has "a lot of time on his hands". When reached for comment, Eminem retorted, "They all do! I can't keep them out of my house! If I am not careful, this could really effect my career." He added, "Look, I am just looking to give them SOMETHING TO DO, SOMETHING! They haven't made an album in years, and I sure AS HELL am not going to help them! They've spent all of their money and now they want 'daddy' to just bail them out." The NFL, upon learning of the negotiation, is abuzz with chatter regarding the sale. The Source, a hip hop magazine was able to reach Bizarre for a comment, "D12 Lions, I like the sound of that!".

Well, Proof died, so I guess he's not leaching off Eminem.

"I pop fo' E's at one time, and I don't need water when I'm swallowin' mine."

R.I.P Proof, word is that Bizarre is a Thundercats fan.